Recoil is governed by Newtonian Mechanics. Ok, for the non-engineers out there: What goes out one end also goes out the other, equalized for the size difference between the firearm and its projectile.
Various nifty recoil functions available over the web will take care of the math, so just go with me a bit.
Faster, higher velocity but smaller projectile may have the same, on paper, recoil as slower, lower velocity but bigger projectile (bullet) and you perceive that the recoil of one is worse for you than the other even though they are the same on paper.
Higher recoil velocity stings, larger projectile smacks more. Kind of the way I perceive it, you may be and probably are different.
I think this is why 1200 fps with larger projectiles is a popular velocity for really large bore guns, works for me. I notice only slight differences in comfort between my Redhawk 45 Colt (3lbs 2oz ) and my SRH 454 (4lbs. 4oz. ): (265gr at 1200 recoil = 1.82, V= 18.74 Free Energy = 17,05) vs.(a 240gr at 1750fps recoil= 2.54, V=19.25, Free Energy = 24.46). The bullets are about the same, velocity huge change. But from a practical stand point not really that different in killing effect, mostly a factor of how far down range and ease of trajectory compensation, big issue for me.
Absolutely worse, nastiest recoil I've ever experienced, rifle; 375 Wheatherby, various way too light shotguns, prefer less than 1oz loads in 12ga. not a big water fowler...
Handgun: Ruger LCR in 357 mag with 180gr full power loads. 1,yes, one pound 4oz loaded weapon vs. a 180gr at 1100fps. Recoil = 1.11, V= 28.57 Free Energy = 15.84. NOTE the BIG difference in recoil Velocity form the other weapons I mention. Small handgrip, barely two fingers for me concentrates a lot of "sting" in a small area. Another reason grips are so very important to me, I have large hands and everyone's are different. Stings like absolute hell to me, only managed 4 out of 5 shot attempt before calling it quits. Regularly shoot 50 rounds plus of 250gr. at 1000 and 25 of 265gr and 10 to 15 at 1750fps with no problems. Prefer multiple trips to the range, 10 minutes from my house to long sections beating my hands to death, have old injuries that would be exacerbated by too much fun.
Have Fun! I know I will!